-
What Lies Beneath the Facade of Faces
We only see what we are shown but underneath there is a struggle, a battle that we don't show to the world. Many of us have been taught through shame not to reveal our secrets, not to let people know our struggles for fear we will be judged as not good enough, not 'normal'. Stigmatized by society as well as our own families not to reveal what is seen as weakness, illness, disease, less than, inadequate, or different.
-
Inside my head. Anxiety and Spiral Thinking.
As the proud owner of an anxiety disorder (PTSD) I am often stuck in my own mind spiraling out of control until I reach the point of panic or wanting to run and hide any time there is the hint of a change in my life.
-
5 Self-Care Tips for When You Are Feeling Depressed
Often when I am in one of my low states of depression I neglect self-care. Really, I neglect almost everything. It takes so much energy just to make it through the day that all ...
-
Death of a Mother
The hardest part is putting that word death in a sentence with your mother. Mom has died. It looks so terrible even written. So short and final. Three words that change the lives of generations.
-
Consumption
Loudness, danger, excitement we are drawn like moths to a flame. Unrestrained, gregarious energy drawing us near drawing us out of our solitary shell. We are drawn to that radiant energy that part we don’t possess within. We don’t see it for what it is a lack of depth and emotion their armour to hide ancient pain, their violence we go closer, seeking refuge seeking love, seeking solace but we are weak and we are consumed. Consumed by the depression there in their shadow we die in the darkness alone.
-
Looking for an Exit
This is the first I have really written in a while. I have basically had a nervous breakdown and have spent the better part of a month trying to recover myself. Trying to find myself amongst the panic and the tears. Trying to make it through the nausea and the disconnection. Trying to survive from one minute to the next while convincing myself to live another day. The medication was a savior and another reason to panic. Days ran on as I slept and felt nauseous. I felt as if I was riding a ferris wheel that kept going faster and faster with no end in site. Holding on, I…
-
Writing Through Anxiety
Reading posts on Speak your Truth about living with anxiety has given me strength to share my own struggle. Not as a means to gain sympathy but in the hopes that someone else will read this and find strength much the same way I found strength from Stephanie Neighbour’s blog. Living with anxiety, agoraphobia, depression, etc., you often feel alone and ashamed, afraid someone will find out your secret and think less of you. The internet has provided a space where from the safe anonymity of the computer screen we can find that we are not alone. I have lived with anxiety and bouts of seasonal depression for most of…
-
Despair
I am tired but my mind will not rest. I can find no relief from this despair and anguish that I feel. I fear I am losing my mind to this insanity that is my body in its present state. This body that is not mine. This body that is possessed by raging heat and mind numbing sorrow. This body that shakes with anxiety at the mere thought of venturing down the street. This body that belongs to some crazed old woman. I am a soul trapped in an illusion of humanity that rebels against all pleasure and knows only pain. A soul that has fallen so deep down the…
