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Leaving home is a formative time for kids. They finally get a taste of independence and get to see what it’s like when mom isn’t there to pick up the pieces. But, it’s not only the kids who experience a reality shock. Parents suffer too because they aren’t used to an empty house. With no kids around to make a mess or noise, the house can feel eerily empty. Thankfully, the extra time you have on your hands is a blessing in disguise. As well as encouraging you to follow your dreams and discover new things about yourself, you can use it to take care of these essential areas of life.
Your Relationship
If you think the bond between you and your partner is going to carry on regardless you may be in for a surprise. Around one in four marriages involving people over the age of fifty collapse thanks to their new environment. Without the kids as a buffer, the stuff they do that annoys you intensifies and gets worse. Therefore, it’s imperative to focus on growing closer as a couple. From date night to working out together and surprising them with gifts, you need to show them you care. The sooner you start, the less chance there is of filing for divorce!
Your Home
Let’s face facts – the house is too big. Sure, you love it and it brings back lots of great memories, but it’s a waste of space and money. As you age, both of them are important as you need to live comfortably. People without a big budget struggle to adapt, while others that suffer from ill health can’t get around their home as easily. Downsizing is the perfect solution as it saves you cash and energy. You may not do it straight away, but it’s worth considering if you think your kids aren’t coming back.
Your Golden Years
Kids are supposed to pitch in when their parents age, yet it isn’t a done deal. Children that live hundreds of miles away can’t pop round and check up on your daily. Therefore, it’s smart to check out the alternatives and put one into action. Senior home care services give you the freedom to stay at home with a little help from dedicated professionals. There is no need to move anywhere and you get peace of mind for you and your hubby if the kids don’t pull their weight. It’s always nice to have a qualified nurse handy.
Your Emotions
It’s normal to feel sad as it’s a momentous milestone in a parent’s life. The children you give birth to and raised are moving on with their lives and it hurts. Still, wallowing in self-pity only makes it harder to transition. Rather than living in nostalgia, it’s best to move on and start a new chapter of your life. That’s why parents turn their kids’ bedrooms into gyms and game’s rooms – it helps them to look forward. Alternatively, you can go back to school and focus on your career.
Are you an empty nester?
How do you plan to adapt once the kids leave?
These are great thoughts. I have one in college now with two to go. I have been a SAHM working a flexible side gig for their whole lives, and I just added another side gig a couple of years ago. We are looking at an empty nest in 4 years, and I’ve been thinking recently about what will change. I have some goals that have been on hold that I may pursue. These 4 things you shared are good things to consider. #inspirememondaylinkup
We’ve been empty nesters for several years – the secret is to be prepared for their eventual leaving – have interests of your own, make sure you maintain a great relationship with your partner, equip your kids to be able to look after themselves – then wave them off and get on with living. I hate seeing mums who are lost and devastated that their kids have gone – be proud that they’re independent and happy and that you contributed to that. We haven’t downsized because we like having enough room for them to come home and visit – downsizing will come when we’re old and gray.
I write a lot about the empty nest and Midlife – so great to meet a fellow Midlifer – I also host a Link Party on Wednesdays that you might like to look at to see if you fit the guidelines and want to connect and share x
We are down sizing – and looking forward to the cosiness. Thanks for the pointers xx
I’m so struggling with all my kids being grown! Esp with one of them living out of state and not seeing him and his daughter!
I feel you. One of mine moved all the way across the country and I rarely see him. It’s hard but video chat does help a great deal.
It’s definitely hard that all my kids are grown now. Esp that one of my sons lives in another state. But they do a fairly good job of hanging with mom. And I spend time with my granddaughter, that helps a lot.
I have a son that lives clear across country but we talk daily and we FaceTime at least once a week. It makes it easier.
Although my kids are still young (10, 6 and 5) I still think about this all of the time! I am definitely not ready but I know that it will help to be prepared. Thank you so much for sharing.